Wtf is this shit. I do something terrible, wrong, selfish thing and everyone from all angles (except for one and myself) keeps telling me I did nothing wrong, that it was God’s plan, to not feel guilty… Wtf.
I’m baffled, confused. Why? How? I don’t want praise, I don’t want pity, I want people to say “yeah you fucked up”, “people make mistakes”, “when did you become so selfish?” (this is one I wonder every day now). Something! I don’t know.
I don’t understand how people think right now. I don’t think people understand how they think right now.
I did something that is clearly not okay, how do people not see that? Have I done a terrific job at my life at pretending I’m such a good person that when I do something bad, people don’t see it as bad? Or is the current mindset, values, morality of humanity right now so fucked up that they really don’t see a bad thing as a bad thing?
I’m truly puzzled.
Am I too hard on myself? Maybe. But it doesn’t take away from the fact that I did something selfishly, and hurt people along the way.
I’m having a crisis of identity. The question “who am I?” has been coming up in my mind lately. And personally, I think everyone should be asking themselves that question nowadays. Hypocrisy is at its peak. We are all hypocrites in some way or another. We are all actors. I think people have lost themselves, their true selves, in exchange to play the game of this planet right now. We’re all in a chess game, carefully planning our next move to avoid getting defeated, surviving, and gaining something, crushing others as we advance in the game.
Let’s stop playing chess.
Let’s chill down, drink some wine, and listen to music and dance instead.
And here’s a song. Not necessarily related to the above, but related nonetheless.